The baby blues: what are they?

Going from laughter to tears, from joy to sadness for no apparent reason? Feeling anxious and not very hungry? You’re not the only one! This short spell of low mood, known as the baby blues, is very common and normal after giving birth! But how long does it last? What causes it? How can you cope with it? We explain everything!

What are they? What are the symptoms?

Also nicknamed the “third-day syndrome”, the baby blues usually set in 3 to 5 days after giving birth. During this time, you will feel great happiness and an overwhelming love for your little one. But you may also feel anxious and low. You might cry for no reason or have trouble sleeping. On top of all this come all the worries linked to your new role as a mum. But don’t worry: this whole mix of emotions is temporary and very common. The baby blues can affect up to 80% of women. Partners aren’t spared either and can also go through this low patch. In most cases, this little episode lasts between 24 and 48 hours and passes naturally. It can sometimes go on for a week, but that is no reason to worry. However, if the low mood gets worse or lasts more than 15 days, remember to see a professional to understand the deeper reasons for how you are feeling.

What causes the baby blues?

Several reasons are now known to explain this low spell of the baby blues.

The first factor is, without a doubt, tiredness. Between the birth, baby’s first difficult nights, and all the demands and frequent visits from family and friends, you build up an enormous amount of tiredness. A second cause is the sudden change in your hormones. For nine months, your progesterone levels gradually rose, only to drop suddenly when the placenta was delivered. This drop affects your mood, your emotions and your sleep. Finally, one last important reason concerns you directly: your feelings and emotions. For nine months you were one with the little being growing in your tummy, and suddenly you feel an emptiness and have the feeling that nobody is interested in you any more. This feeling is completely normal. While you were the centre of attention and all eyes were on you during your pregnancy, it is now your little one who is the focus of all that interest, and you have to learn to accept it. Add to this accepting your mum’s body with its few pregnancy pounds, as well as all the responsibilities that come with this new role. It is a whole build-up of physiological, psychological and physical changes that you have to get to grips with – and it isn’t easy!

Don’t feel guilty if you’re irritable, if you can’t take any more of baby screaming, not sleeping through the night and not being quite how you imagined – you’re far from the only one!

How can you cope with it as best you can?

Fortunately, various little things will help you feel better during the baby blues! First, lean on your partner and your loved ones. Talk to them about your worries and your feelings: they will help you get through this stage! Don’t hesitate to turn to the paediatric nurses or midwives around you either: they are used to it and will be there to listen and help you during this time. Next, look after yourself! Rest is the key word. Try to sleep when baby sleeps and, above all, give your mind a break. Think of yourself, do things you enjoy and make time for your social life. To get through this period more easily, also spend special moments with baby, going for walks or doing skin-to-skin. Finally, to reduce your anxiety, learn to organise yourself and, above all, delegate as much as possible, especially to your partner. Freeing your mind of a few tasks will surely save you a few crying fits!

How is it different from postnatal depression?

While the symptoms of the baby blues can resemble those of depression, it is their intensity and duration that set them apart. If your tiredness grows, your stress turns into real anxiety attacks and, more generally, your low mood persists and gets worse, then it is postnatal depression. This depressive condition affects around 10% of women and occurs between 15 days and 1 year after giving birth. It can last several months, or even more than a year. In any case, keep an eye on baby blues that last longer than 15 days and see a doctor straight away.

Your tears, your irritability, your guilt, your joy: all these reactions after the birth of your little one are completely normal! Rest assured: with rest, attention and patience, this short period will pass and you will be able to enjoy your baby to the full!

Dylan
Proud dad of three little ones and founder of Premiers Moments. Together with the whole team, I share our parenting tips here to support you, from pregnancy through your child's first years.